How to Let Go of Constant Guilt

As we near the holiday season, so many people are feeling tapped out, exhausted and in need of a real break.

It’s been months of performing “business as usual” in a freakin’ pandemic – nothing is business as usual here!

Be it working from home with boundaries blurred, putting in longer hours to fit it all in, or just trying to find five minutes to pee with back-to-back online meetings.

Supporting your team’s different struggles and needs, and figuring out how to stay connected virtually when everyone is feeling a little Zoomed out.

Or really being there for your kids and online school, having to learn math again and not just squeeze them into your already busy day because they matter too.

This can create a feeling of a constant guilt and worry as you try to juggle it all.

Guilt from feeling like you’re not doing enough. Guilt from wanting to simply rest and disconnect over the holidays. Or even guilt with your family because so much is different this year and you can’t do the usual things.

What are you feeling guilty about?

As the Frozen song goes . . . it's time to Let it go!

This guilt steals your presence. It steals your joy. It wastes your energy. It does NOT give you the break you definitely need.

How can you let go of the guilt and worrisome thoughts?

1)  Remind yourself on the reason ‘why’ you need to take a break or say no to something. What are you saying yes to instead? Why this is important to you? It can drown out the guilt.

2) Move your attention. Your mind is tricky and will go where you take it. The more you focus on your guilty or worrisome thoughts, the more you will have them.

When unhelpful thoughts pop up (and they will), notice them and gently move your attention back to the present moment or reframe to a more optimistic view . . . like your reason why! Even if you have to do it 100 times a day!

3) Be kind to yourself. Beating yourself up about what you did or didn’t do doesn’t help anyone, especially not you. It’s been a tough year and self-compassion is key.

And finally, honor your needs. Listen to what your mind and body are telling you.

It’s WAY easier to fall into negative thoughts and guilty feelings when you are tired and run down.

I myself am feeling tapped out. Even though I am keeping boundaries and feeling calm for the most part, little things are frustrating me more easily and I'm tired.

I have learned to listen to my own needs better. I have learned to let go quickly of any guilt. And, I for sure can't wait to take a break over the holidays!

You too can give yourself a real break and let go of the guilt.

When you let go you make room for more presence, more joy and more energy for what you do want.

What Next?

You can sign up for Stacey's masterclass, The Confident "No" here.

Stacey L. Olson is a Leadership and Certified Positive Psychology Coach, has 15 years of corporate experience and has gone through her own transformational change from burning out to balanced in life while performing at a high level (both in her corporate career and own business). She works with professionals who want to work less, live more and be their best even with all the demands, high expectations and messiness of everyday life. Stacey is the founder of The Balanced Leader™ program and offers executive and leadership coaching, workshops, and speaking.